Last fall I went back to school to work on a master’s degree and study full time. As the semester began, I found myself feeling somewhat underutilized and wondered if I was making good use of my time and abilities, and if the degree I was pursuing would lead to a job that would support not only me, but a family. I regularly found myself waking up in the middle of the night, worrying about the future. Although I prayed about these fears on and off and found brief periods of relief, I seemed to oscillate between feeling at peace and woefully inadequate.
One afternoon I was doing some homework at the public library when these fears consumed my thought, and I decided to go for a walk outside. With all the mental might I had, I denied the aggressive suggestions bombarding me and affirmed that God, divine Love, was my source of supply. I realized that my true need was not for money, credentials, or food on the table, but for the spiritual recognition that God’s goodness was already present, waiting to be seized. The spiritual ideas He gives us meet every human need and are infinitely rewarding and satisfying. I have full access to them, and I only needed to act with the authority that comes from knowing this in order to see what God had already provided.
As I continued on my walk, deep in thought, I passed several homeless men. One of them stopped me and explained that he needed lunch and didn’t have a way to pay for it and asked if I could help him out. Having had similar experiences around my church neighborhood, I declined to give him any money but said I had another errand to run and would consider picking up some food for him. As I walked away, I had a feeling that neither of us expected to see one another again.