As an active portion of one stupendous whole, goodness identifies man with universal good. Thus may each member of this church rise above the oft-repeated inquiry, What am I? to the scientific response: I am able to impart truth, health, and happiness, and this is my rock of salvation and my reason for existing—Mary Baker Eddy (The First Church of Christ, Scientist, and Miscellany, p. 165).
AT THE AGE OF EIGHT, I was the youngest member of a local Girl Scout troop. When it came time for a statewide competition for the members of all the troops to display their varous skills, I signed up to demonstrate making eggnog, the simplest and easiest item on the docket.
The big day came. I could hardly wait to have my turn at showing others how to make this sweet drink. But, when I saw so many other girls demonstrating this same skill—all of them older and obviously more experienced—my confidence fizzled. Then one of the girls finished her demonstration by gracefully slipping a pretty pink striped straw into each glass. That did it. I knew I couldn't top that! I begged my mother to pull my name from the list of eggnog demonstrators. In spite of her appeals that I at least try, my tears won out. Off the hook, I quickly rebounded, happily dabbling in the other activities of the day—ones that demanded so much less of me.
Then it came time for prizes. I joined in applauding the winners, that is until the last award stunned me. A beautiful set of pans went to the "youngest" one who had demonstrated—to a girl in my troop who was six months older than me. For a very long time I struggled with deep regret. I didn't have to be "the best" of many or better than anyone else, or even have pink striped straws. I only needed to do what I had been taught to do the best I knew how—in other words, to express or demonstrate what I understood—to have received a reward, one that would also have benefited another. (My mother would have loved those pans!)
This childhood lesson and those sweet words of Mary Baker Eddy about answering the call of "What am I?" come back to me from time to time. They remind me to keep wholeheartedly recommitting myself to expanding my understanding and practice of Christian Science healing—no matter how modest I think my own demonstration may be. And to persistently guard against comparing myself to others.
Who shall be greatest? is not in the question or the answer to the question "What am I?" The answer is not even "We." The answer is: "I am able ..." Are you ever tempted to think of the pillars of the church—both those wonderful early workers and those who grace our presence today—as making a larger contribution to the Cause of Christian Science than you could possibly ever make? Do you shyly linger in the shadows of materiality, devoting more of your time instead to the "cares of this world" (Mark 4:19), feeling a bit inadequate to the task of demonstrating Christian Science more fully yourself? Mary Baker Eddy didn't see any of the members of her Church as less than capable of doing great good.
Each of us has the capacity to put more and more into practice each day what it means to be the image and likeness of God, to "impart truth, health, and happiness" to others—to demonstrate our reason for existing. The reward for oneself and all humanity for gingerly stepping up to the plate and doing just that is a whole lot more satisfying and lasting than a set of pots and pans. And it includes no regret.
