I wish to relate a healing of jealousy and a bad disposition that came about through the consecrated, prayerful work of a Christian Science practitioner. As a result of this work, I learned many important lessons in obedience.
At this time I studied Christian Science and claimed to be a Scientist; but I did not express the qualities of a genuine one, and I was in very poor health. I was fearful, full of distrust, suspicious, envious, defiant, and unruly.
Although I was in a disturbed state of mind, I was seeking divine guidance and was led to visit a practitioner in his office. I told him of my physical problem, and he asked me to study the references to the word "yield" in the writings of Mrs. Eddy. I felt strengthened and uplifted after the visit to his office, and he assured me he would continue to work prayerfully for me.
Soon afterward I had a disagreement while out visiting. When I returned home from my visit, I called the practitioner and told him that it did not matter to me if I was never healed of the physical problem but that I must be healed of the evil traits of character I was expressing. The practitioner's prayerful work had uncovered the root of the physical trouble. He referred me to the article entitled "Taking Offense" in Mrs. Eddy's "Miscellaneous Writings."
The article seemed to have been written for me. There were two parts, in particular, I just lived by. The first reads (pp. 223, 224): "The mental arrow shot from another's bow is practically harmless, unless our own thought barbs it. It is our pride that makes another's criticism rankle, our self-will that makes another's deed offensive, our egotism that feels hurt by another's self-assertion. Well may we feel wounded by our own faults; but we can hardly afford to be miserable for the faults of others."
I realized I must subject my thoughts to God. I had been accepting evil thoughts as real and a part of my thinking. This, I realized, was something to be corrected in myself and not in another.
Further down on page 224 Mrs. Eddy states, "Then, we should go forth into life with the smallest expectations, but with the largest patience; with a keen relish for and appreciation of everything beautiful, great, and good, but with a temper so genial that the friction of the world shall not wear upon our sensibilities; with an equanimity so settled that no passing breath nor accidental disturbance shall agitate or ruffle it; with a charity broad enough to cover the whole world's evil, and sweet enough to neutralize what is bitter in it,—determined not to be offended when no wrong is meant, nor even when it is, unless the offense be against God."
I simply lived these words. Each time an evil suggestion of jealousy came to me I refused to accept it as real or as any part of my thinking, then I willingly and lovingly conformed my thoughts to God and His perfect, spiritual, and good creation, as we are taught to do in Christian Science.
I also learned from the practitioner that my obedience to God has nothing to do with the other fellow—what he does, rightly or wrongly—but wholly with what I do, rightly or wrongly. I learned to declare continually that man includes only Godlike thoughts, impulses, and impressions.
It also became clearer to me that neither matter nor mortal mind conditions me, for I am conditioned by God, Spirit, and that since Life is God I am a reflection of that Life. I saw that life is not a containment of God's qualities but a reflection of them.
I realized I must love unconditionally, without reservation, with a love that is not a mortal, frivolous thing, but one that beholds the kingdom of heaven as ever-present and spiritual perfection as the real being of all God's creation. The practitioner reminded me to love, without an object, a reason, a goal, a hope of gain or reward, just to express the Love that is God.
In a few weeks I was healed. My health became excellent. I became strong, and my motives had become purified. My actions were reflecting uprightness and Godlikeness, for I was expressing obedience to God.
Christian Science daily enriches my life. My gratitude for having attended a Christian Science Sunday School and for my children's attendance is unceasing. For membership in The Mother Church and a branch Church of Christ, Scientist, for class instruction, and for the daily instruction I receive through the study of the Lesson-Sermon in the Christian Science Quarterly I can only show my gratitude by daily purification that comes from the dedicated desire to understand, embody, live, and love the wonderful truths of Science. I am deeply grateful for Christ Jesus, our dear Master, and for our revered Leader, Mrs. Eddy, who, through her spiritual-mindedness and unselfed endeavor, discovered and founded the Science of Christ, the Comforter, for all mankind. "My cup runneth over" (Ps. 23:5).— Fort Worth, Texas.
