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Standing orders

From the March 2006 issue of The Christian Science Journal

I FELT LIKE I WAS STUCK IN A RUT. As a single mother of two young children, I craved more structure, direction, and financial security in my life. So I made a major change and enlisted in the US Navy.

This meant I had to leave my children in my father's care while I went through vigorous physical and mental training. My baby, Johnathon, was only six months old at the time, and my older son, Matthew, had just turned three. I couldn't see or talk to them for the two months of training. This was very difficult for me, and I found myself questioning whether I'd made the wrong decision and if I was being a bad mother.

I hadn't given much thought to religion or God in recent years, but I found that the rigors of training now motivated me to start seeking spiritual support. I had been exposed to Christian Science as a young girl, so I was very grateful to learn that there was a Christian Science service held every Sunday morning at my training center in Illinois. I was in tears the first time I attended a service because I missed my children so much. But after the service, I met with the Christian Science chaplain. He helped me to understand that God's law doesn't just take us part of the way. When God sends us out on a mission, He supplies everything we need for that mission to be a success. The chaplain helped me to understand that I had the strength, endurance, and trust in God's care to know that just as He is Father-Mother to me, He is also Parent to my children. I didn't need to give in to what was really a false human sense of emotion, loss, or fear — false because God didn't create it.

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