Some years ago, when in a state of utter weariness and despair, I turned to a friend for comfort and help. She told me gently that it was all God's will, and that I must accept it as such and not question it. This answer to my search for help awakened me, and I said, "If this is God, I don't want Him." That night, I knelt by my bedside, weary, ill, disillusioned in the God I had always tried to serve. I was speechless; I tried to say the Lord's Prayer, but I rose in rebellion at the words "Our Father" because He seemed no father to me. I was spiritually hungry; I felt lost that I now had not even a God to love. My heart rose in earnest, humble desire to find some help, and I resolved there and then that I would diligently seek for a power of good, which I believed existed somewhere, and that wherever my seeking took me, there would I follow.
I had previously worked in an orthodox church, but now I stepped out, seeking this power for good. My search led me almost everywhere— practically all isms were tried, but it was always the same, I was lost and lonely. Then, one Sunday evening, I walked into a Christian Science church. It was all very strange to me, and I did not understand it; but there at least I was conscious of a wonderful sense of peace. I attended about five Sunday evening services, and then decided to ask someone to explain the doctrine of Christian Science to me. I was very lovingly given the textbook, "Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures" by Mary Baker Eddy. I decided that after a fair reading I should know if my search was over and if I had at last found the God for whom I had been searching, a God who really is Love.
Within a month, after I had read and studied no farther than the first chapter, on Prayer, I was compelled to admit that I had experienced a wonderful healing.
