Some years ago while I was in the regular company of one particular man through work we were doing together, I began to feel very attracted physically to him. He had told me that he could read other people's minds and had implied he knew how to manipulate others. I am married, and these thoughts and feelings scared and shocked me. In time, the attraction became stronger and the fear and darkness so intense that I despaired of staying in control. All the good that I valued—my desire to progress in my understanding of God and to reflect His qualities, my love for my family and friends, my usefulness at home, at church, and at work, my health and peace — all seemed to be threatened by what was becoming an obsession.
After struggling on my own for a while, I called a Christian Science practitioner for help through prayer. The spirit of Love that was expressed gave me hope. I felt a sense of Fatherly love in which I was not perceived as a trapped, impure mortal but as the good, useful, spiritual child of God. The practitioner prayed diligently for me. And during the entire time this problem was being worked out, I was protected. There were no immoral actions.
The healing did not come quickly and there were setbacks. But progress was made. The Bible and the writings of Mary Baker Eddy make it clear that all that really exists comes from God, good, and that man is the perfect likeness of God. Any concept of man as less than perfect is false, illusory. I wanted to feel the truth of these spiritual facts, not just know them in theory. Persistence was of primary importance. Basic to the healing, I feel, was my following the guidance included in a paragraph of Science and Health by Mrs. Eddy which begins (p. 495), "When the illusion of sickness or sin tempts you, cling steadfastly to God and His idea." I often would take a simple truth and hold it in thought as best I could—and as long as necessary to counter the false sensations.
