For about two years I had been praying, off and on, about a growth on my eyelid. When the growth got larger, I became very discouraged and decided to have a doctor remove it. I told myself then that the problem was only a cosmetic one and I shouldn't waste any more prayer time on it; I had more important things to think about. My husband, who is not a Christian Scientist, had had a minor surgical procedure done for something similar, and so I assumed it would be a simple matter.
I first visited the doctor for a diagnosis, and an appointment was made for me to return in a week to have the growth removed. During that week I became very upset with myself. I'd been healed through prayer many times during the previous eight years, since coming into Christian Science, and so I knew that a physical problem is merely the surface manifestation of a deeper need to know God better. I also knew that though a surgeon could remove the outward growth, he could not remove the misconceptions in thought, which were the root of the problem. Only Christ, Truth, could do that. And without that healing of thought—and greater freedom from the belief of life in matter —I knew I'd be liable to a return of the physical difficulty. Besides, I'd seen some solid healings through prayer: an overnight, complete healing with no scar of a deep cut my son sustained in a sledding accident that ordinarily would have required stitches; an instantaneous healing of headache and a very quick healing of flu for myself. These and other healings had come about easily. But now I had to admit I felt stymied. I just didn't believe that I "had what it takes" for this healing.
I called a Christian Scientist friend to help me pray about my situation and to help calm my thought. At this point I didn't feel that I could turn to Christian Science; I thought that the only thing I could do was to follow through with the operation. My friend was so loving and not in any way judgmental about my decision. She just agreed to pray for me. To my surprise, I woke the next morning with a strong conviction that I could rely on God to heal me. I canceled the medical appointment.
