YEARS AGO, I had to have a physical exam for a job. The examining physician detected two lumps in my right breast. I had discovered these lumps myself years earlier, and when I did find them, I was startled at first and felt very frightened. But I made an important decision: I would put aside my fears and reason things out spiritually. I had experienced many healings through prayer, including quick healings of severe frostbite and a burn from resting my hand on the exhaust pipe of a go-cart.
My initial prayer was very simple and based on this passage from Genesis, "And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, it was very good" (1:31). I reasoned that since every single manifestation of God was good, including me, I couldn't have anything painful or harmful. God, who is divine intelligence, created everything in His perfect likeness. Each time the lumps came to my attention, I would revisit these ideas. Yet my physical condition remained the same.
Now, these years later, after the physical examination, the doctor told me I should undergo further testing, which I did. They indicated the lumps were benign. This sequence played out the same way over the next several years when I was required to have physicals for other jobs and during the time I was pregnant with my two children. Each time I was relieved with the diagnosis (that the lumps were benign), but felt unsettled, frustrated—even angry with myself—for my inability to practice Christian Science and heal this condition. I must say, though, that over the years the condition never kept me from work, from caring for my family, or from the normal physical activities I enjoyed, like skiing and golf. At one point I prayed to understand if there was some symbolism in this condition. Did it have to do with some misconception I was holding about being a woman? I realized the answer was no. Matter has no ability to be symbolic because it has no real substance. God is the only substance of the universe, including me. Mary Baker Eddy wrote that God, also known as Spirit, "is the life, substance, and continuity of all things" (Science and Health, p. 124).
