IT is over two and a half years since I began the study of Christian Science, and I have hesitated till now about writing a testimony, because it seemed to me that I had so little to tell which was likely to interest others or be useful to them; but recently I have been led to see that others may be in much the same condition as I was, and that a plain account of what brought about this extraordinary change in me may possibly be helpful to them.
I was educated very strictly and carefully in the religious thought of the established church, and up to about three and twenty I had never felt the slightest doubt as to its doctrines being the whole and only truth. My secular education had been of an old-fashioned type. cramped, narrow, and little calculated to develop the thinking powers. At about the time I mentioned I began to study many subjects, chiefly with my husband's help and guidance. I was particularly attracted by such subjects as geology and all that relates to the present and past condition of the globe, but I soon discovered that these teachings could not be made to agree with the religious teachings I had received and accepted. At first this was a great shock to me, and I thought it must be wrong to read such books. I tried to give them up. but the attraction was too great.
I found, too, that on serious consideration there were some doctrines which I could not accept,—one being the atonement: another: that God either produced or was unable to prevent the evils that I saw around me. Then, too, the forms and rituals which appeared to be a necessary part of religion repelled me. In short. I could see what was wrong, but no way out of it, and after struggling with the problem for about five years, I definitely gave up all connection with the church, threw myself entirely into secular studies, and called myself an agnostic. This went en for about twenty-five years and I supposed would always continue so.
