During an alumni rugby game at the college I attend, I missed a tackle and another player accidentally rolled over my ankle and injured it. Immediately, I began to pray and started by mentally declaring truths I have learned in Christian Science about my spiritual identity. I knew that I am the perfect child of God, Spirit, and that as His spiritual reflection, I could not experience any pain. After praying, I was able to continue playing without any discomfort, but following the game I began to struggle walking and soon after could no longer run.
At first, I continued participating in rugby practices. Even though I was praying, I often found myself resorting to human willpower to try to push through the pain and keep practicing. At times, when my thought was focused on God, I was able to run freely. However, when I resorted to relying on my own willpower, I found that I was barely able to jog, much less run. While I really wanted to continue participating in rugby practices, I knew it was a right idea to take time off to diligently pray and address this issue and not just keep powering through it or waiting it out. It wasn’t an easy decision, but I needed to listen to God, and I knew I could still support my team and help in whatever way I could off the field.
I started praying with the idea that since I am spiritual, not material, I cannot swing like a pendulum between feeling free to run and then experiencing pain. I knew that this was because pain could not be part of my spiritual identity. The Discoverer of Christian Science, Mary Baker Eddy, explains this in Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures when she writes: “Man is not a pendulum, swinging between evil and good, joy and sorrow, sickness and health, life and death. Life and its faculties are not measured by calendars. The perfect and immortal are the eternal likeness of their Maker” (p. 246). I also worked with an analogy I learned in my Christian Science Sunday School class that illustrated the relation of the material to the spiritual: If you think of an ice cube and then go into a sauna, you’ll notice that the ice cube won’t melt. This is because the ice cube is in your thought, not in the actual sauna.
Likewise, I knew that I could not change from my innate state of perfection to being physically injured because I am an idea of God—spiritual, not material. I also called a Christian Science practitioner for some extra support, and we each prayed, realizing that God’s spiritual ideas cannot ache, be inflamed, or be in pain.
Rugby season finished without my return to the team, but I felt peaceful with the progress of my healing. After winter break, I returned to school with confidence that I was healed, and I was looking forward to demonstrating the fruitage of this healing through training and competing in track. I participated in the training camp the first few weeks with ease and experienced no discomfort. However, at our first meet of the season, the pain I had experienced the previous semester returned, and I wasn’t able to run more than a mile without a lot of discomfort.
I felt discouraged and frustrated and started to resort to human will again to try to keep running. However, I realized that if I wanted to be truly free, I needed to stop using human will and completely trust God. Jesus shares this idea with us in the Bible when he is praying to God, declaring, “Not my will, but thine, be done” (Luke 22:42). I knew I needed to allow God’s will to be done in this situation, so I prayed to Him for guidance. Even though it was not what I wanted to do, I was led to drop track for the semester and focus completely on prayer and doing God’s will.
I didn’t see much progress at first, but I later learned it was because I still was not fully trusting God and His will in all aspects of my life. Even though I felt that I was doing His will in regard to running, and I was praying to better understand my spiritual identity, I was still using a lot of human will in other tasks, especially academics.
During the last few weeks of the spring semester, I was working on a major program for a computer science class. About halfway through, I got stuck on an issue for several hours. No matter what I tried to do to fix the issue—or bug, as we say in computer science—I could not solve it. Finally, I realized I needed to stop using human will and turn completely to God. I sat back, closed my computer, and started to pray. In the Glossary in Science and Health, Mrs. Eddy defines God as “… Principle; Mind; Soul; Spirit; Life; Truth; Love …” (p. 587). I have learned in Christian Science that these are synonyms for God, so I started to pray to better understand each of these synonyms and the qualities of God that express them.
I declared that my intelligence and capabilities come from God, Mind, and that as His reflection I am always reflecting Mind. I also knew that everything would work the way it needed to because I was expressing Principle, and Principle’s laws are ever present. Additionally, I worked with the idea of having freshness of thought—spiritual inspiration. I knew that new, right ideas are always coming to me, and I only need to listen and be receptive. And I knew that I was expressing Love in my love for coding and problem solving. After about 15 minutes of praying with these ideas and the other synonyms for God, I felt a sense of peace. I opened my laptop and, piece by piece, the program came together and worked! By turning fully to God, I was guided in knowing what to write and change. I hadn’t ever turned to God before for guidance with computer science, so I was so grateful for the realization that I really could trust God in any situation and trust that I reflect God perfectly. This realization resulted in an immediate healing with my ankle.
That afternoon while working out, I had a sudden urge to go on a short run. I was feeling spiritually uplifted from the morning’s demonstration on my computer program. I could finally see how I could give up human will in all situations and always turn to God. I was able to run with total freedom and no pain at all. During the following weeks, I was running four to five miles a day, rejoicing in God every step of the way. In addition to feeling comfortable and free while running, I experienced no soreness, stiffness, pain, or any other side effects after my runs. I knew I was healed!
Since then, I have continued to increase my running distance and improve my speed without any problems. At the same time, I learned how to trust God, even when I need help with my schoolwork.
I am so grateful for this healing. Although it seemed long and frustrating at first, when I learned how to give up human will and rely on God in all situations, the healing came instantaneously. Now, whether in sports or in the classroom, I know I can always turn to God first.
Christopher Hronek
Interlochen, Michigan, US
