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OUR COMPANY MANNERS

From the October 1952 issue of The Christian Science Journal


Most of us in childhood were told to be on our best behavior when we went visiting or when company was expected in the home. This meant that we must be quiet, orderly, courteous, and conservative in speech and general demeanor. Consequently, the mode of conduct on those occasions was sometimes designated as "company manners." The results were often awkward and cramped and were climaxed by a bit of boisterousness when the visit was ended. Nevertheless, the discipline was good for us because it required more thoughtful consideration of others than did the less formal attitude permitted among members of the immediate family.

A Christian Scientist was one day lunching with a young niece who in a moment of impulsive confidence suddenly said: "Auntie, I have a temper. Do you have a temper?" Never before having been confronted with this question, the aunt thought a moment, then, half jestingly, but in all honesty, replied: "Well, dear, to tell you the truth, I have lived so much among strangers and the public during my life and have had to keep on my company manners so much of the time, I hardly know whether I have a temper or not."

Thinking over the incident later, the Christian Scientist recalled Mary Baker Eddy's question in "Miscellaneous Writings" (p.126), "Who hath not learned that when alone he has his own thoughts to guard, and when struggling with mankind his temper, and in society his tongue." Thus the necessity to conform more closely to the conventions demanded outside the home is a salutary and protective, force in anyone's life, regardless of the probability that one's conduct may fall short of the desired standard on occasions. How much more truly gracious living would prevail in families, among friends and business associates, if everyone would don his company manners on all occasions, instead of having a dual standard of conduct.

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