When I first began to learn of God through the study of Christian Science I rejoiced, "O how love I thy law! it is my meditation all the day" (Ps. 119:97). As a result I experienced many physical healings, some of which were mentioned in my testimony in the Christian Science Sentinel of July 9, 1955.
Then came a long period of time when I felt a frequent sense of frustration, and when physical problems appeared I could not heal myself, though I always got relief when I appealed to a Christian Science practitioner.
Culminating a series of events, I found myself with only sixty-five dollars and a seven-year-old car to show after some thirty years of employment. With some serious thought I realized that my delight in spiritual unfoldment had been abandoned for a quest for the loaves and fishes—Christian Science had seemed to become for me something to use to obtain a mortal, material outlining of what constitutes good. Seeing this lack of a spiritual incentive in my approach to Science was a reawakening. I joyously exclaimed, "I have lost nothing," and from then on my prayer has been, "Teach me Thy will." My first big lesson was to overcome a sense of false responsibility. There are many others I am still learning, including expressing a truer sense of joy and confidence—confidence of God's ever-presence.
