I HAVE DONE MANY THINGS I'M NOT PROUD OF. But the lessons I've learned from my trespasses have become priceless to me. Step by step, I've learned to forgive those who I felt had wronged me, and—most of all—to forgive myself.
Self-forgiveness may seem self-serving, but it's one of the most selfless acts there is. It means doing as Jesus instructed: "First cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye." Matt. 7:5. In other words, be willing to work on our own faults, so we see clearly enough to help others overcome theirs. But it's difficult to see things clearly when you have so much anger, as I did.
After my father died during my last year of high school, I became a different person—not only angry, but selfish. I thought family and friends had somehow let me down when I needed them most, and I started telling lies, stealing from my mother's purse, and drinking excessively. Yet, I covered it up, making all kinds of excuses for myself.