ONE EVENING a number of years ago my husband noticed a large lump on one of my breasts as I was putting on my nightgown. This discovery was terrifying, not only because it brought to mind a well-publicized disease, but because I had found that it was always easier to pray about challenges without the added pressure of concerned family. My husband was a very devoted member of another Christian denomination and was quite worried when I told him I wanted to rely solely on God for healing of this condition. Yet when we retired for the night, I was unable to sleep. The fear of disease almost overcame me.
The next morning I called a Christian Science practitioner as soon as I could to ask for prayerful support. My husband and I then went to our respective jobs. Apparently, he discussed my situation with several people at work, and possibly with a good friend who was a medical doctor. When he returned home after work he told me that he wanted to talk with me. He said he had learned that this lump could be very serious and that it would not just go away. He urged me to do something about it right away. Then he asked me, "Aren't you afraid?" The encouraging words the practitioner had spoken to me that morning gave me the conviction to answer, "No, I am not!" I think that put my husband's mind at ease, and he never asked me that again. I knew that it was absolutely necessary to deny that fear has any reality, or power to govern us, if we expect healing. A lifetime of healings through the practice of Christian Science had taught me this.
For the next 18 months I prayed on and off with the practitioner, and I can truthfully say that I never had any pain. I lived night and day with many wonderful spiritual truths in the Bible and the writings of Mary Baker Eddy. I did my best to challenge every fearful thought with an awareness of God's goodness and love. The Bible says, "There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment" (I john 4:18). I stood firm with the truth that God is Love and that there is no space for fear or disease in divine Love—or in me, Love's reflection.
