Surprising as it seems, I believe it to be true that not a little positively false morality is taught children by respectable and educated persons, — not consciously, of course, but through want of thought as to the impression made upon the child's mind by the words and actions of its elders. It is not only ignorant and irresponsible nurses, but too commonly the child's own mother who confuses its sense of right and wrong, by putting the expedient before it in the place of the right. This happens every time a child is bribed to obey by the promise of some reward. He learns that he is to do right, not because he knows it is such, or because simple obedience is imperative, but because doing the right thing is to bring him some advantage.
Conversely, therefore, if to do it brought some disadvantage, or even if it brought nothing with it to gratify the child's wishes, it would no longer be right. Motives to right-doing are too often urged which, if not actually bad, are certainly not the best; as when children are told that their friends will not love them unless they behave in a certain prescribed manner.
The appeal to affection is no doubt legitimate in its place and degree, but the parents' affection ought not to be held up as a prize for right conduct. A father may properly tell his children that he is pleased when they do right and grieved when they do wrong, but a child should never be allowed to believe that, whether pleased or grieved, his father has ceased, or could cease, to love him.
