The fact that little children are coming under the sweet influences of Christian Science, is very lovely to me, and my mind often travels backward over my childhood days, recalling many instances where, could I have been taught my true relationship to God, I would undoubtedly have been saved much mental and physical suffering.
My parents were church members and brought their family up according to their light. I was taught to think of God as a being high up in the clouds, watching to see if I went wrong, which I often did no doubt. When I was ten years of age I went to live with an aunt who had no children of her own. She was of a religious turn of mind, and thought it her duty to be very strict with me. While I was reasonably obedient to her wishes, I inwardly rebelled against it all because I saw much that was inconsistent in the daily lives of professing Christians, and I resolved that if the time ever came when I could choose for myself, I would never enter a church. Later, when I married, and was free to act for myself, for ten years I remained away from all churches, seeking my happiness in worldly amusements. By invitation of a friend I attended a church service at which I heard a sermon on "Love," the text being, "God is Love." I was greatly impressed, and it resulted in our taking seats in that church.
Years passed. I drank deeply at the fountain of this world's so-called pleasures, and eventually, after the birth of my last son, my health became broken and gradually I gave up everything, even the care of my home and children. All that a loving husband could do, was done. I had the advice of two of our leading physicians, but nothing gave permanent relief. I seemed to suffer everything mortal could suffer and live; and, true to my childhood's teachings, I concluded that God intended I should suffer for my sins, and so I became melancholy and looked for death as a relief from bodily misery at least.
