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Words fail when I attempt to express my gratitude to...

From the June 1908 issue of The Christian Science Journal


Words fail when I attempt to express my gratitude to God, and to Mrs. Eddy for the wonderful truth contained in "the little book," Science and Health, which as a "Key to the Scriptures" has opened up to me that sacred volume, for I never understood the Bible before. This understanding has also brought about my emancipation from sickness and sin, and for a long time I have wished to express my gratitude for all the blessings which have come to me through the understanding of Christian Science. I was first healed physically of a very serious nervous disease, from which the physicians said I could never be free. This trouble affected me mentally, and threatened to rob me of my ability to earn my own living, as teaching aggravated the illness, according to the doctors. After going from one physician to another for years, in search of health; after depending in vain upon my much beloved church for healing, and finally giving that up, I disbelieved all which I had been taught from childhood to love and reverence. I gave up friends and hope, and in desperation I reached a woeful state of unbelief in God. One can hardly realize my despair, disbelief, depression, melancholy, and hate of the world generally, which at length culminated in a desire to end my existence.

At this time some friends advised me to try Christian Science, and I was told that God is Love. I flatly denied the statement, and told the practitioner it was impossible for me to believe that. I had suffered much in my wanderings in sickness and sin, but I was led to the Father at last, and was healed in one treatment, although I continued the treatment for three weeks, because it brought me such peace. The morning after my first treatment was one of great happiness, for it seemed as if I had really awakened in another country. I was free from all pain, worry, hate, and fear, and I was radiantly happy for the first time in many years. I looked about me, at the usual furnishings of my room, in surprise, as if I had been roused from some bad dream, and to my great joy this wonderful sense of health and strength not only lasted throughout the day, but has continued through these many years. It certainly was to me the new heaven and the new earth spoken of in the Bible.

Since that awakening, ten years ago, I have been gaining an understanding of Christian Science. I have found God. infinite Truth, a divine Principle to live by, and a church. I have been trying to rid myself of the "heavy baggage"(Miscellaneous Writings, p. 327) of self in ascending the mountain. I am tempted often to regret my slow progress, but I rejoice to see the sure spiritual growth as I look back and view the path over which I have traveled. Sometimes, when almost overwhelmed by the uncovering of sin in my thought, there comes the realization of man as God's idea, the comfort of release from anger, resentment, and like sins, the power to do right, and the joy of a glorious hope of ultimate freedom,—salvation from all error.

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