At a time when I felt distant from God, when my lifestyle did little to embody a devotion to spirituality, I found myself hungry to go to church. I had been raised as a Christian Scientist but during college had become somewhat ambivalent about studying the Bible Lessons and going to church. At times I was downright cynical about what I perceived to be the pitfalls of organized religion. But on this particular day, in a city and country far from my home, I longed to feel God's presence.
As I got to church just in time for the first hymn, a man standing down the row from me caught my eye. He was singing with such sincere joy, praise, and gratitude that it was all I could do not to simply stand there and watch him. His expression of praise and love spoke to me in a way that I could understand —that felt relevant. There was nothing ritualistic or lifeless about his religion. The love and joy were palpable. It was obvious to me that this man's communion with God was not dependent on being in that church or with that congregation; he was conscious of, awake to, the omnipresence of God's love. His face was shining with an understanding of this.
That day I glimpsed something I had been hungering for: the true spirit of Church, the living, vital presence of God. It helped me realize the importance of following my inner yearnings and spiritual intuition more fully. It made me want to move beyond the cynicism I felt about organized religion. I began to see that my inspiration (in church or in daily life) is dependent on my communion with God, not on other people.
