CURLED UP IN MY COMFY CHAIR one morning, with my cat, Buster, in my lap, I found myself asking God if He thought I knew how to pray. I really wondered if I was doing it right. I had been raised as a Christian Scientist, and my family had always relied on prayer. It seemed like the most natural thing to do. But when I became an adult and needed to pray on my own, I didn't feel quite so confident. My prayers weren't having the positive effect I needed, and relying on God just didn't seem practical. I felt disconnected spiritually.
But sitting in my chair that day, the house quiet, my boys at school, I longed to know what it was that other people were getting from their prayers that I wasn't. I wanted to feel so close to God that I would have no question of His loving presence. To know my relationship to Him as never before. I needed the words I was reading in the Bible and Mary Baker Eddy's book Science and Health to have a profound meaning. A meaning that would move me to a greater trust and a deeper understanding of my divine nature. Humbled, I thought that the only thing getting in the way of this pure prayer was me. Me, thinking too much, and not listening enough. Right about then, my cat awoke with a wide yawn and stretched out his paws. Buster was 14 years old at the time and had slowed down considerably. He had also been plagued with ulcers on his back for a number of years, one of which had recently become the size of a quarter. These abrasions didn't seem to bother Buster, but they were troubling me.
I tickled Buster under his chin as I thought of the precious lessons I had learned from my cat over the years. He had approached most things in his life with an unflappable repose and remarkable patience. Three young boys in the house and plenty of gophers outside gave ample proof of that. And on this day in particular, I was awed by Buster's gentle spirit. I felt God's love shine through him and me. I realized that God's very thought was forming Buster. God didn't create him once and let him be, but is continually creating him, and me, and all of us. I could really feel the effect of this thought. It was tangible, and I was energized! This must be prayer! My desire to feel close to God was being answered.
