As First Reader at my branch church, I put together a Bible lesson on the healing of depression for a Wednesday evening testimony meeting. Gideon, an early Israelite leader (see Judges 6:11–40), feels ill at ease because of the evil intentions of the surrounding peoples that want to do him and his fellow Israelite settlers harm. In his despondency he appeals to God. He wants to see a sign from God that his fleece of wool is “wet with dew” and that the surrounding ground is dry.
As I understand it, he wants to see that his protective fleece is bathed in dew—a symbol of goodness and grace. Yet he wants to see this goodness and security exclusively for himself and his people, while seeing “dryness,” or lack of fulfillment, for those around him—his enemies. It is a very personal request from a despondent leader.
To me, the fleece represents the “armour of God” (Ephesians 6:11). Gideon was a man of valor. He knew how to wield a shield. Yet he couldn’t quite recognize that God was there to protect and guide them. This sense of a depressed state is furthered by his reference to how poor his family is and how he feels as if he is “least” in the family.
God has assured him, “Go in this thy might, and thou shalt save Israel,” but Gideon is not satisfied with this manifestation of grace toward him.
Soon though, he asks God for a second sign with the fleece—but this time is different. He asks that his own fleece be dry while the ground around be wet. God then fulfills his request. To me, Gideon is acknowledging that even when his own inspiration is dry, there is still dew enough on all the ground around to be a blessing. It is as if he is recognizing God’s grace enduing all with goodness. With Gideon’s renewed confidence and leadership, the Israelites move forward, and further victories follow.
It is easy to get lost in Bible narrative with the feeling of the exclusiveness of God’s love for a select people. But the golden thread that runs through stories such as this is that the idea of one God is to be cherished and loved, and that His love raises us all up.
I can recall periods in my own experience, where I wished to be freed from the downward pull of depressed thinking—to be drenched in the refreshing dew of grace. Grace is defined in Strong’s Concordance as “the divine influence upon the heart, and its reflection in the life,” and is to me where bountiful blessings ensue.
In one instance I couldn’t understand why my career was not blossoming. In a sense I felt disarmed and without my own fleece or armor to sally forth in life’s great adventure as a fulfilling work experience. At the same time I wished to see a less “dewy” reward for those in competition with me—to have them wait their turn. Others were garnering fruits of their labors, but I wasn’t.
I had a sense of justification that I should be endued with success and others were the ones who would have to wait and struggle through their “dry” period. But thinking about Gideon and the lesson of the fleece and dew, his persistent entreaty to learn about God’s grace for all, I can now see that even in the seeming thick of the battle, where things are not prosperous—the dry periods—there is always room for God’s “grace to come to perfect bloom” (Ethel Wasgatt Dennis, Christian Science Hymnal, No. 3).
Today I feel gratitude for lovely lessons that bloom in thought. My true vocation is to practice Christian Science, which leads the way to true harmony. I am further reminded that my being, happiness, and fulfillment is painless and permanent, with no room for depression—but enriched in the joy that none can take away.
