I write in loving gratitude for the peace that Christian Science has brought me. I have indeed found it to be "a divine utterance,—the Comforter which leadeth into all truth" (Science and Health, p. 127). Since the age of ten I had always been delicate, but it was not till the winter of 1896 that I became very ill, and from that time never regained my health. Three years later I underwent an operation, which did not improve matters, and repeated attacks of severe bowel and stomach trouble made me an invalid, unable to eat, sleep, or lead an active life as I longed to do. I consulted several doctors, who gave me only partial and temporary relief, the last specialist I saw candidly saying he could not guarantee the cessation of these recurring attacks. Just at this time my father lost his money, which made ill-health a greater burden, but through all this my belief in God was my help and comfort. I clung to Him, though blindly, praying that He would deliver me from sin and disease, which I feared as having real power, and I believed that this could only be accomplished through death.
It was while I was trying to become obedient to what I deemed God's will that I was told I could be healed by realizing the allness of God, it being explained that if God is omnipresent and omnipotent, there could be no evil power. At first I refused to accept this statement, as I distrusted the channel through which it came, but a few days later I realized that this might be God's answer to my prayers and that I must not let His blessing go by unheeded and misunderstood. I then accepted unreservedly this statement, and listened to what was told me; not knowing that what had appealed to me were plagiarisms from "Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures" by Mrs. Eddy, of which book I had then never heard. I began to realize at once the fact that if God is all and everywhere, there were no diseased conditions and no power opposed to good. In so doing a load seemed to be lifted off me. I became radiantly happy. My headaches disappeared; I slept well; I began to eat everything with impunity, and in about a week I was almost absolutely well. I threw away all medicine, though it took me two or three weeks to realize that I was now free in every way. For three months I worked happily for myself and others, wanting nothing. I wrote to tell my brother in Hong Kong of my wonderful healing, suggesting that I should come and share this joyful knowledge with him.
At the end of the three months, however, difficulties seemed to come up, and old, unsuspected fears, which I had not sufficient understanding to meet. Not knowing the source of the statements which had brought about my healing, I went to others; but though I met with kindness, I did not get the help I needed, and two very dark years followed. All seemed to be gone from me; though I knew there was a great truth, it seemed obscured, and my difficulties seemed more than I could bear. However I tried to walk by the light I did see, though it was but a glimmer, and at the end of the two years the means and opportunity came for me to go to Hong Kong. I no longer felt able to explain my healing, but I reflected that Jesus had said to his followers, "Take no thought beforehand what ye shall speak, neither do ye premeditate: but whatsoever shall be given you in that hour, that speak ye: for it is not ye that speak, but the Holy Ghost." I therefore decided to go, trusting not in my own strength. Having heard the name Christian Science, I asked what it was, but was told by people ignorant of the subject that it was a matter of Mrs. Eddy's personality, and that her followers believed they had no bodies; and I was recommended to buy some books on mental science. These I read on the voyage, but felt they did not bring me nearer God or the realization of the pure truth which had healed me.
