Christian Science came to me while dwelling in the shadows of unbelief and fear. All my life I had been searching for an understanding of God and had reached the conclusion that an honest seeker must be satisfied with an unknown God.
During this period I was in a very miserable state, both mentally and physically. I had been operated upon twice for internal difficulties, and in spite of conscientious obedience to the doctors' instructions I was never well. Through a great desire to help a dear friend I began to study the textbook of Christian Science, "Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures" by Mary Baker Eddy, which it had seemed impossible to do when it had been presented to me eighteen years before. At first it was very difficult to become interested in the reading, or to understand any of it; but one day the truth of the statement of Christ Jesus, "Whosoever shall not receive the kingdom of God as a little child shall in no wise enter therein," dawned upon me, and I turned deliberately away from my self-satisfied reasoning, with a new-born desire to be taught. Then the light came, and it has indeed led me all the way.
I have been completely healed of insomnia, severe headaches, rheumatism of some years' standing, and nervousness; and have been kept in health and strength for many years. The period of selfish invalidism from which I emerged through Christian Science I now know to have been simply a lack of understanding of God, resulting in selfish insistence upon my own comfort, desire for sympathy, irritability, impatience, and fear. These dark shadows of mortal belief are fading away and are being replaced with the joy of the peace that passeth understanding; and I know that, in proportion as self is replaced by unselfed love, greater joy and freedom will be mine. After coming to Christian Science the habit of taking medicines dropped from me, but I soon discovered that my dependence upon them was only transferred to the use of tea and coffee, which I took in increased quantities whenever I became weary or ill. Through a desire to be consistent and honest, this habit was entirely overcome and great freedom followed.
