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For many years I was very much...

From the September 1936 issue of The Christian Science Journal


For many years I was very much prejudiced against Christian Science, seizing eagerly on any adverse criticism of the subject and of Mrs. Eddy. I once skimmed her textbook, "Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures," and rejected it, thinking, in my ignorance, that it belittled the sufferings of Jesus and upset the whole doctrine of the atonement as I conceived it. Having been brought up in an atmosphere of extreme Calvinism, I had formed a concept of God as a strange combination of extreme kindness and extreme cruelty —boundless goodness to the very few and remorseless harshness to the remainder of mankind. I endured torments as a child from these theories, and can appreciate Mrs. Eddy's courage when she opposed her elders on such points in her early girlhood.

I reached middle age with conflicting and unsatisfied beliefs about religion, never uniting with any church, and yet honestly desiring to know the truth about God and Life, trying to teach my young sons faith in and love of God, and having many wonderful proofs that God does hear and answer prayer.

During the World War, driven almost desperate with anxiety, with my three sons flying and in constant danger, I was compelled to turn more earnestly to God. One day a telegram came to say that our eldest son was dangerously wounded in head and leg. Then followed a week of silence. That week stands out in my memory. I realized the presence and love of God as never before, and felt that "His arm encircles me, and mine, and all," though I had never heard those words from Mrs. Eddy's Poems (p. 4); and I felt that my boy was safe in the love and sunshine of God. I seemed to be lifted above the earth, and to get a glimpse of the spiritual realm, and of man as God's beloved son. I shall not go into details, but shall just say that though terribly injured, he made a very good recovery and has ever since led a particularly useful and vigorous life.

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