I am so deeply grateful for Christian Science that I feel I must speak out, since someone else may benefit from my experiences. About three years ago I felt I had lost everything. I was making a slow recovery from a back injury, and I had lost a sister and a nephew from the belief of cancer. When I began to manifest symptoms, I was more than a little shaken. Fear and confusion took over.
I wish I could say that I took hold and reversed the fear immediately. But I didn't. All I could think was, "Why?" I told no one about my feelings. I could not talk about them. I also could not seem to get my thinking straight. I wanted to run away. Anywhere. That year I went to New York for the Christmas holidays. The trip was a disaster. Running away did not help. I was terribly frightened and extremely irritable. It is a wonder I did not lose all my friends. When I returned home I sought the help of a Christian Science practitioner, who lovingly gave direction to my study: eradicate personal sense, deactivate the seeming effect, destroy error. But I was still running.
I planned and took a trip to the Middle East. Running did not help this time either. Considerable pain was telling me that I had better get busy. I began to study the Bible and Mrs. Eddy's writings, especially the healings in both. By now I was praying constantly. The book of Job was helpful. Job, too, thought he had lost everything. But by seeking to know God, he had been abundantly blessed. There was daily study of the citations and references given me by the practitioner. And I read the periodicals from cover to cover, paying special attention to the testimonies.
