I sat at my desk planning my escape. The dreaded memo reminding staff members of that afternoon's office party lay in front of me. Normally I looked forward to socializing, but not that day. The thought of standing around making small talk with strangers on the first day of a new job filled me with panic. Everybody else knew each other, and I knew I would feel like the odd man out.
I contemplated leaving early, but decided it wouldn't convey the dedication and commitment I wanted to express on my first day at work. Then, I considered staying at my desk—hoping no one would notice—until I learned that the space for office parties was located right in front of me. I even toyed with the idea of hiding in the bathroom, before I finally sighed, put my hands in my lap, and quietly turned to God in prayer.
During the previous months of unemployment, I had spent days praying for a better understanding of my identity and self-worth. It seemed to me that society often judges a person's worth by their wealth, career, and family life. I felt that, as a relatively poor, unemployed, single man, I didn't rank very high on society's identity/self-worth scale. And I wanted very much to overcome the embarrassment I felt about losing my previous job and not being married.