I had been nearly two years in recovering from a long sickness, and convalescence was so slow that the time seemed endless. I could hardly imagine myself again walking, running, or doing anything naturally. I even counted my steps day by day, for fear of overdoing, until I seemed like a machine. The doctor at last told me that if I ever got well he could not assure me that I would never have the sickness again. I thought this a cruel thing to say, and was so discouraged that all seemed hopeless; but neither he nor I knew what good he did in making the remark, for through it I left him. At this time I heard of Christian Science, and of a wonderful case of healing, and felt that if I only could have treatment, I also could be made well. We then got a copy of Science and Health from the library, and with reading it and having long talks, I began to apply my understanding of Principle to my walking. I had three weeks' treatment, and then the joy of being free.
Several years before, I had been obliged to give up my piano studies for a year, since five fingers had given out as the result of over-practice. I was also extremely nervous. Later on, I could, by being very careful, practise every day, but only fifteen minutes at a time. A while after accepting Christian Science, when any suggestion of the old hurt seemed to come, I thought, If God fills every part of the universe, and God is good only, then this cannot be true. It came to me clearly that there was positively no room for this trouble, and it disappeared. I can now practise three hours at a sitting if I wish, and at the end feel as fresh as when I started.
I have felt the need of gratitude and am learning how to be grateful. I did not seem to know how to begin, but an article in the Christian Science Sentinel gave me just the start I needed. It was so simple, and made me feel ashamed that I had never thought of it before. I saw that I must first dig up the roots of ingratitude and then fill the space with good thoughts. I had heard different ones tell in Wednesday evening meetings of being healed while there. I knew it was true but did not imagine that such a thing would ever come to me. Twice since then, however, I have been healed of two very annoying ailments, and it seemed most wonderful. At another time I was healed of a cold at one of the lectures. Demonstrations in respect to supply are very wonderful, be they great or small. "Seek ye first the kingdom of God, . . . and all these things shall be added unto you." Thomas doubted Jesus' presence until he could see and feel the prints of the nails in his hands. It occurred to me that I was like Thomas,—it seemed, if I did not feel and see the supply in my hand, that God was not providing for me. I was startled as I thought of it, and began to realize that God's presence and love are everywhere, that my supply was in His ever-present love, that I did not need to see it or have it in advance, that I had it, for all I had to do was to "hold fast" and to just know the truth.
