Before I found Christian Science, life was a puzzle to me. The mortal cycle of birth, growth, maturity, and decay depressed me. It seemed that life had no purpose. Even more disturbing was the human suffering I saw. Why did God allow it? Orthodox theology left me bitter and dissatisfied. Why would God send His creation to hell?
By the time I was sixteen, I had decided that either there was no God, or if He did exist, He was harsh and I wanted nothing to do with Him. But deep inside, I longed to know what truth was. I used to wish that I could talk to Jesus, to ask him what he knew about God and what life was really all about. I wasn't aware yet that the Christ is always present to comfort and heal mankind, as I learned after I began to study Christian Science.
After my first quarter at college, I went home to live with my mother. She had recently had several experiences that convinced her God's power is a present reality. This inspired me, and I began to study parts of the Bible again with renewed interest.
