Several years ago I felt very lonely, in desperate need of friendship. Suddenly one day I was struck by this passage from Science and Health by Mrs. Eddy (p. 266): "Would existence without personal friends be to you a blank? Then the time will come when you will be solitary, left without sympathy; but this seeming vacuum is already filled with divine Love." I pondered this statement quite often after that, wondering what good could be gained by "existence without personal friends." Gradually the realization came to me that, rather than seek the love and respect of others, I could and should express those qualities I admired, myself.
I began to do this and discovered that as I consciously endeavored to be more just, more caring, more joyful, more alert, I no longer felt as lonely as I once had. New friendships developed and older ones deepened. I still had a nagging feeling, though, that without romantic male companionship there was a void in my life.
As I studied the chapter entitled "Marriage" in Science and Health, I realized that each individual is a complete, spiritual idea, not needing another to complement that completeness and fully capable of expressing both feminine and masculine qualities. Rather than busily seeking out some "great guy" for myself, I saw that I could be at peace in the knowledge that as God's complete idea I lacked nothing, now or ever.
