I had become very competitive while driving. On the road, I often saw myself and others engaged in one-upmanship, where I would maneuver my vehicle to “beat” them as though it were a race. I would cut people off, react to others’ driving, and get angry at their behavior.
Growing up, I had attended a Christian Science Sunday School and learned of God’s love for all of us and how natural it is for us to express that love to each other. As an adult, I joined a branch Church of Christ, Scientist, and was an active member. I considered myself to be embracing and expressing the qualities Jesus modeled. However, I was unaware that I had somehow managed to separate my Christian ideals from my very unchristian driving behavior.
While praying one day about what Jesus referred to as the two great commandments—to love God and love our neighbor as ourselves—I abruptly came face to face with this incongruity and recognized my need for healing. I realized that my anger and my behavior had the unintended consequence of making me feel separate from God, good, and that shocked me out of my complacency. I began praying daily, specifically while driving, with these verses from Psalms: “Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: and see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting” (139:23, 24).
